The best letter in the history of the “Dear Abby” column

Dear Abby,

My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning, and, when I confront him, he denies everything. What’s worse, everyone knows that he cheats on me. It is so humiliating. Also, since he lost his job six years ago, he hasn’t even looked for a new one. All he does all day is smoke cigars, cruise and pal around with his buddies while I have to work to pay the bills.

Since our daughter went away to college he doesn’t even pretend to like me and hints that I may be a lesbian. What should I do?

Clueless

Abby’s answer:

Dear Clueless,

Grow up and dump this loser. Good grief, woman! You don’t need him anymore.

You’re a United States Senator from New York. Act like one.

Best Regards,

Abigail Van Buren

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