A black cat crosses your path and drops dead.
Your over 25 and still live with your parents or some other relative. If you are 30 or more, well enough said…
You take an assertiveness training course and you’re afraid to tell your wife.
Your chauffeur is on parole for car theft. (Actually, you just remembered you don’t even own a car like that.)
You have to take out a loan just to get money for the down payment.
Your children’s school calls to surrender.
The bride’s family throws rocks instead of rice.
Your wife wraps your lunch in a road map.
Your plants do better when you do *not* talk to them.
All your modeling jobs are for cartoonists.
Your engagement ring is, upon closer inspection, plastic.