- “Women should be obscene and not heard.” Groucho Marx
- “What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce.” Mark Twain
- “Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.” Charlotte Whitton.
- “I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.” Joan Rivers.
- “Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement.” Mark Twain
Relationship Advice Quotes
- “A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.” Groucho Marx
- “Wild horses couldn’t drag a secret out of a woman. However, women seldom have lunch with wild horses.” Ivern Boyett.
- “Women: Can’t live with them, can’t bury them in the back yard without the neighbours seeing.” Sean Williamson.
- “I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat or a prostitute.” Rebecca West.
- “As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.” Oscar Wilde
- “When women kiss it always reminds me of prize fighter shaking hands.” HL Mencken.
- “One of the reasons I don’t see eye to eye with Women’s Lib is that women have it all on a plate if only they knew it. They don’t have to be pretty either.” Charlotte Rampling.
- “When women go wrong, men go right after them.” Mae West.
- “She doesn’t understand the concept of Roman numerals. She thought we just fought in world war eleven.” Joan Rivers.
- “She looked as if she’d been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say when.” PG Wodehouse.
- “Women are nothing but machines for producing children.” Napolean Bonaparte.
- “An archaeologist is best husband a woman can have: the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.” Agatha Christie.
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