You can tell it’s going to be a bad day when
You wake up face down on the sidewalk.
You wear your bra backwards and are more suitable.
You call prevention of suicide and they hold you back.
You see a ’60 minute’ news team waiting in your office.
You want to wear the clothes you wear at home from parties and
they are not there.
You turn on the news and they show emergency routes out of town.
You wake up to find your waterbed is broken, so remember you don’t have it
Your car’s horn comes out accidentally and remains jammed when you join a group
Angel of Hell on the highway.
Your wife wakes up with amorous feelings and you have a headache.
Your boss tells you not to take off your coat.
You wake up and your braces are locked together.
You call your answering service and they tell you that is none of your business.
Your blind date turned out to be your ex-wife.
Check your income tax bouncing.
You put both contact lenses in the same eye.
Your favorite stone snaps at you.
Your wife said, “Good morning, Bill” and your name is George.