Why did the Hen Cross the Street?

Plato: For the larger good.

Karl Marx: It was a historic inevitability.

Machiavelli: In order that its topics will view it with admiration, as a rooster which has the daring and braveness to boldly cross the street, but additionally with concern, for whom amongst them has the energy to cope with such a paragon of avian advantage? In such a way is the princely rooster’s dominion maintained.

Hippocrates: Due to an extra of sunshine pink gooey stuff in its pancreas.

Jacques Derrida: Any variety of contending discourses could also be found throughout the act of the rooster crossing the road, and every interpretation is equally legitimate because the authorial intent can by no means be discerned, as a result of structuralism is DEAD, DAMMIT, DEAD!

Thomas de Torquemada: Give me ten minutes with the rooster and I will discover out.

Timothy Leary: As a result of that is the one form of journey the Institution would let it take.

Douglas Adams: Forty-two.

Nietzsche: As a result of should you gaze too lengthy throughout the Street, the Street gazes additionally throughout you.

Oliver North: Nationwide Safety was at stake.

B.F. Skinner: As a result of the exterior influences which had pervaded its sensorium from delivery had triggered it to develop in such a style that it might are inclined to cross roads, even whereas believing these actions to be of its personal free will.

Carl Jung: The confluence of occasions within the cultural gestalt necessitated that particular person chickens cross roads at this historic juncture, and due to this fact synchronicitously introduced such occurrences into being.

Jean-Paul Sartre: To be able to act in good religion and be true to itself, the rooster discovered it essential to cross the street.

Ludwig Wittgenstein: The opportunity of "crossing" was encoded into the objects "rooster" and "street", and circumstances got here into being which triggered the actualization of this potential incidence.

Albert Einstein: Whether or not the rooster crossed the street or the street crossed the rooster relies upon upon your body of reference.

Aristotle: To actualize its potential.

Buddha: In the event you ask this query, you deny your individual chicken-nature.

Howard Cosell: It might very nicely have been one of the astonishing occasions to grace the annals of historical past. An historic, unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to try such an herculean achievement previously relegated to homo sapien pedestrians is really a outstanding incidence.

Salvador Dali: The Fish.

Darwin: It was the logical subsequent step after coming down from the timber.

Emily Dickinson: As a result of it couldn’t cease for demise.

Epicurus: For enjoyable.

Ralph Waldo Emerson: It did not cross the street; it transcended it.

Johann Friedrich von Goethe: The everlasting hen-principle made it do it.

Ernest Hemingway: To die. Within the rain.

Werner Heisenberg: We aren’t certain which aspect of the street the rooster was on, however it was transferring very quick.

David Hume: Out of customized and behavior.

Saddam Hussein: This was an unprovoked act of insurrection and we had been fairly justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gasoline on it.

Jack Nicholson: ‘Trigger it (censored) needed to. That is the (censored) motive.

Pyrrho the Skeptic: What street?

Ronald Reagan: I overlook.

John Sununu: The Air Drive was solely too glad to offer the transportation, so fairly understandably the rooster availed himself of the chance.

The Sphinx: You inform me.

Henry David Thoreau: To reside intentionally … and suck all of the marrow out of life.

Mark Twain: The information of its crossing has been vastly exaggerated.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.