U.N. Chief is Assured that Gaza Strip will be Rebuilt in Time for It to be Flattened Once more in Subsequent Outbreak of Hostilities

U.N. Leader is Confident that Gaza Strip can be Rebuilt in Time for It to be Flattened Again in Next Outbreak of Hostilities

António Guterres, Secretary Basic of the United Nations, proclaimed yesterday that “there isn’t a doubt in my thoughts that we are able to restore in a well timed style all of the houses and companies in Gaza that have been devastated in the newest episode of violence between Israel and Hamas, in order that these constructions shall be ready to be devastated but once more when the 2 combatants resume their frequently scheduled s**t-show in a couple of years.

“I’m not saying that each Gaza household may have a completely appointed kitchen, or an out of doors deck with a deluxe Weber grill, or a Jacuzzi, however I’m certain we are able to assure microwaves and chemical bogs for all.”

When requested by reporters if he ever will get pissed off by the seemingly limitless nature of this Mideast battle, Guterres smiled and responded in a voice barely above a whisper:  “Actually, it’s not an issue.  Every time I begin to expertise despair over the mind-numbing madness of all of it, I simply shut my eyes and go Zen.  Then I open them and watch a couple of episodes of Pals.”



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