Tips on how to break up with girlfriend in ten straightforward steps?

So that you need to break up together with your girlfriend, however you do not need to make her unhappy?

How to break up with girlfriend
Tips on how to break up with girlfriend

What you have to: 12 torches, 1 roll of sellotape, 1 darkish cape or blanket and 1 tub of hair gel. 

Step One: Flip the entire torches on. Within the fashion of a suicide/illumination vest, connect six of the torches to your torso utilizing the sellotape. Connect a a torch to every thigh and shin and one to every forearm.

Step Two: Cowl your self in a thick darkish blanket or cape.

Step Three: Break into your girlfriend’s home at midnight.

Step 4: Unscrew any lightbulbs that will exist contained in the room (Not those inside your torches).

Step 5: Take away the cape/blanket.

Step Six: Scream very loudly.

Step Seven: As soon as your girlfriend is awake, calmly say the phrases “Be not afraid”. This may assist her to not be afraid.

Step Eight: As soon as you’re 100% positive that your girlfriend will not be affected by worry, say the next phrases:

“(Insert Girlfriend’s title) , I’ve some excellent news and a few dangerous information. The dangerous information is I’m a ghost. I’ve been a ghost this complete time. My spirit has remained right here on Earth as a result of I by no means bought to experience real love. The excellent news is I’ve lastly discovered real love and that love is the one I share with you. My soul can lastly be put to relaxation. Goodbye.”

At this stage your girlfriend might be 70% sure that you’re a ghost. The sunshine coming out of your torches can have created an otherworldly non secular glow, like that of Patrick Swayze within the last scene of the favored unhappy film ‘Ghost’.

Step 9: Flip to go away. Simply earlier than you get to the door, attain into the bathtub of hair gel, take out a handful and rub it on the deal with. Exit the room. Shut the door.

Due to the 30% doubt that you just won’t have actually been a ghost, your girlfriend will now try to comply with you. To take action she might want to activate the door deal with. Upon doing so she is going to discover her hand lined in what she is going to instinctively mistake for ectoplasm (the sweat of ghosts). All doubt will now be erased from her thoughts.

Step Ten: Go away the nation ceaselessly. Your girlfriend won’t attempt to contact you or expertise disappointment as a result of she is going to know that you’ve got gone to Heaven; an exquisite completely happy place that has no telephones.

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