Medical Phrases for Disagreeable however Humorous, Conditions from the Nationwide Lampoon

F.L.Okay.: “Humorous-looking Child.” Normally a mongoloid.

F.L.P.: Dad and mom of an F.L.Okay.

CRUMP, GORK, VEDGY: A affected person requiring intensive care, incapable of
motion, and
CROCK: Hypochondriac.

MARRIAGEABLE MONSTER: A younger feminine affected person who has efficiently undergone
main cosmetic surgery.

GOMER: A senile, messy, or extremely disagreeable affected person.

FASCINOMA: A “fascinating” tumor; any fascinating or amusing malignancy.

DROOLER: A catatonic affected person.

CUT AND PASTE: To open a affected person, uncover that there isn’t any hope, and
instantly sew him up. Nicely, virtually instantly. Generally younger
surgeons observe surgical methods for some time first.

FOUR F-ER: A gallbladder affected person. “Fats, forty-ish, flatulent feminine.”

PINKY CHEATER: Latex finger cowl utilized in gynecological and proctological
examinations.

ROAD MAP: Accidents incurred by going by means of a automotive windshield face first.

A HOLE-IN-ONE: A gunshot wound by means of the mouth or rectum.

THE “O” SIGN: The letter O as shaped by a affected person’s gaping mouth.

THE “Q” SIGN: A affected person giving the O signal along with his tongue hanging out.

THE DOTTED Q: The “Q” signal, with a fly on the tongue.

SIDEWALK SOUFFLE: A affected person who has fallen from a constructing.

LOOSE CHANGE: A dangling limb in want of amputation.

BULL IN THE RING: A blocked massive gut.

GONE CAMPING: Reference to a affected person in an oxygen tent.

EATING IN: Intravenous feeding.

BORDEAUX: Urine with blood in it.

SCRATCH AND SNIFF: A gynecological examination.

ANGEL LUST: A male cadaver with an erection.

HIT AND RUN: The act of working rapidly in order to not be late for an additional
engagement.

CAPTAIN KANGAROO: Chairman of a pediatrics division.

ROOTERS: Indigents and hangers-on who collect in big-city emergency rooms in
order to be entertained by reputable circumstances.

SHORT-ORDER-CHEFS: Morgue staff.

LOOP THE LOOP: Flamboyant surgical rearrangement of the intestines.

BUGS IN THE RUG: Pubic lice.

HEY DOCS: Alcoholics handcuffed to wheelchairs in big-city medical wards
who, on the sight of a white coat, bleat out in refrain, “Hey, Doc!”

BLOWN MIND: Gunshot wound to the top.

BOOGIE, GOOBER: A tumor.

THE DEEP FRY: Cobalt remedy.

ROASTED GOOBER: A tumor after intensive cobalt remedy.

HEALTHY GOOBER: A lifeless affected person.

BURY THE HATCHET: Accidently leaving a surgical instrument inside a
affected person.

BOTTLE RETURN: Removing of a bottle that’s vacuum-jammed within the anal canal,
normally of a gay.

SILVER GOOSE, SILVER STALLION: Proctoscope.

SQUASH: Mind.

GAS PASSER: Anesthesiologist.

CRISPY CRITTUR: A affected person with extreme burns.

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