How much time U Spend on the Internet

1.    You find yourself typing `com` after every period when using a word processor.com
2.    You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
3.    Your start introducing yourself as `John at I-I-Net dot com.`
4.    Your wife drapes a blond wig over your monitor to remind you of what she looks like.
5.    All of your friends have an @ in their name.
6.    You can`t call your mother – she doesn`t have a modem.
7.    Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.
8.    You laugh at people with 2400 modems.
9.    You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you landscape.
10.    You refer to going to the bathroom as [downloading].
11.    You tell the cab driver you live at:
12.    Your spouse makes a new rule: `The computer cannot come to bed.`
13.    You ask a plumber how much it would cost to replace the chair in front of your computer with a commode.
14.    You start tilting your head sideways to smile :-).
15.    You turn on your computer and turn off your spouse.
16.    Your spouse says communication is important in a marriage, so you buy another computer and install a second phone line so the two of you can chat…”

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