Fb Standing – SIlly Fb Statuses

Some attention-grabbing standing updates that rapidly went viral on Fb.

Sexy-girl-using-computer

    • I’ll be again in 5 minutes. If I’m not, learn this once more 😀
    • I always hated weddings as a result of previous individuals would come over and poke me saying “You’re subsequent.”. They stopped after I began doing it to them at funerals.
    • U have 10 fish, 5 drown, 3 come again to life. What number of fish do you may have? Cease counting sensible one. Fish cant Drown
    • I’m questioning if one can develop marijuana on Farmville then promote it on Mafia Wars?
    • Have you ever observed that the “lol” image appears like a drowning man? I wager hes not laughing out loud!
    • I’m thinkin about takin my very own life, I’d as properly. Besides they may not promote weed in hell 😛
    • I generally assume that Fb ought to change the standing query from “What’s in your thoughts?” to “What’s your drawback as we speak?”
    • When persons are singing Joyful Birthday to me, I do not know the place to look.
    • Phases of affection. 1) xoxo. 2) xxx. 3) ex.
    • Synthetic intelligence is not any match for pure stupidity.
    • Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I’m midway by means of my fish burger and I notice, Oh man….I may very well be consuming a sluggish learner.
    • I went to see my physician. “Physician, each morning after I rise up and look within the mirror, I really feel like throwing up. What’s flawed with me?” He stated “I don’t know however your eyesight is ideal.”
    • I might fairly attempt to carry 10 plastic grocery luggage in every hand than take 2 journeys to deliver my groceries in.
    • Girls mustn’t have kids after 35. Actually… 35 kids are sufficient.
  • If you happen to assume no one cares if you happen to’re alive, strive lacking a few funds.
  • The quickest technique to double your cash is to fold it over and put it again in your pocket.
  • The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
  • A good friend is somebody who will bail you out of jail. A greatest good friend is the one sitting subsequent to you saying ‘boy was that enjoyable.
  • We stay in a society the place pizza will get to your home earlier than the police.
  • My opinions might have modified, however not the truth that I’m proper.
  • URGENT WARNING! Fb now robotically scans your mind by means of your monitor. To dam, go to kitchen, get aluminum foil, and wrap it round your head. Keep calm, and breathe by means of your left nostril ONLY. It is a major problem and has been confirmed by a good friend’s cousin’s girlfriend’s neighbour’s son’s child’s mama and her pet chihuahua.
  • Life’s a bitch, if it have been straightforward it’d be a slut.I’d name you a device, however even THEY serve a function.
  • Loss of life is life’s means of telling you that you simply’ve been fired. Suicide is your technique to inform life,
  • “you possibly can’t fireplace me, I Stop!”
  • I swear my pillow may very well be a hairstylist I all the time get up with the wierdest hairdos.
  • FACEBOOK STORY: Add as good friend – Approve -> Write one thing on wall -Intro – On a regular basis chatting – Ask quantity telephone – Messaging – Calling – Assembly – Categorical love – Make relationship standing – Hangout – Misunderstanding – Battle – Break up – Unfriend – Block !THE END
  • My mate modified his Fb standing to “suicidal, standing on the sting of a clifft” So i poked him…
  • I’ve to train early within the morning earlier than my mind figures out what I’m doing.
  • Bizarre discovery of the day. If you happen to kind a phrase in Fb (in a remark, standing, and many others.) that occurs to be the identical as your password, after you click on “Share”, Fb robotically converts it to asterisks to guard your safety. Permit me to show. My password is *******

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