Every takeoff is optional – Every landing is mandatory

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The passengers wondered where the pilots were. Finally the door opened and the pilots walked in, wearing dark glasses, tapping canes and being led by guide dogs. They turned the wrong way and walked towards the tail. The steward tapped them on the arms and said, “Sir, the cockpit’s the other way”.

They turned around, tripped over several seats and were finally guided into the cockpit. The door shut behind them. The passengers looked at each other with worried looks. Surely this was a joke?!

Then the voice came onto the intercom. “Hello, everybody, this is Captain Blind Freddy here, and with Copilot Blind Bertie I’ll be flying you across the Pacific, in this year of the disabled.”

The intercom went dead. The engines started up. The passengers gripped the armrests of their seats in deathly silence. It moved, turned and then was off down the runway. It stayed on the ground, on the ground, on the ground and was just about to plough into Botany Bay in Sydney when the passengers let out one almighty scream.

Then the plane took off in a perfect arc and headed east.

In the cockpit, Captain Blind Freddie felt across for Copilot Blind Bertie’s arm, and said, “You know, Bertie, one of these days they’re going to scream too late, and we’ll crash and we’ll be killed.”

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