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WARNING Dark Humor – Dead Baby Jokes

What is purple and sitting in the corner? A baby plays with a plastic bag.

What’s green and sitting in the corner? The same baby three weeks later.

What’s black and sitting in a corner? Babies with fingers at power point.

What’s more fun than nailing a baby to the wall? Tear it again.

What’s more fun than spinning a baby on clothes at 100mph? stop it
with a cricket bat.

Why does the baby cross the road? It is clamped to chicken.

What’s the difference between a truck full of babies and one truck full of marbles?
You can’t load marbles with pitchforks.

What’s green and rotates at 100mph? A frog in a blender.

What’s red and rotates at 100mph? A baby crawling in after that.

What is black and rotates slowly? Fetus in a rotisserie.

What do you call two abortions in a bucket? Siblings.

What’s red and sitting in the corner? A baby plays with a razor.

What’s red and sitting in the corner? A baby shaves his head with a potato peeler.

What color is blue and sitting in the corner? A baby plays with a plastic bag.

What’s green and sitting in the corner? The same baby three weeks later.

What’s black and sitting in a corner? Babies with fingers at power point.

What’s more fun than nailing a baby to the wall? Tear it again.

What’s more fun than spinning a baby on clothes at 100mph? stop it
with a cricket bat.

Why does the baby cross the road? It was nailed to the chicken.

What’s the difference between a truck full of babies and one truck full of marbles?
You can’t load marbles with pitchforks.

What’s green and rotates at 100mph? A frog in a blender.

What’s red and rotates at 100mph? A baby crawling in after that.

What is black and rotates slowly? Fetus in a rotisserie.

What do you call two abortions in a bucket? Siblings.

What are the colors blue and yellow and float on the bottom of the pool? Baby with
slashing the wings of water.

Why can’t the baby turn around in the hallway? He has javelin through it
neck.

What’s black and bobs up and down? A baby on a toaster.

What is the difference between abortion and sand? You can’t eat sand.

What is BABYLON? The objects you spray on the baby before ironing.

What’s purple, filled with pus and scream? Babies peeled in a bag of salt.

What is screaming and spinning around 100mph? A baby in an electric fan.

What is more fun than a barrel full of dead babies? One barrel full of dead babies
with those living at the bottom trying to wake up.

How do you get the baby out of the blender? With a straw.

What has four wheels, smoking and screaming? One bus loads the baby on fire.

What bounces up and down at 100mph? A baby is tied to the back of the truck.

Is it chocolate and gurgle? A baby in a casserole.

What is better than a baby in a bucket? The same baby in two buckets.

What events can almost change the course of history? Dingo
Bethlehem.

What is the best caregiver you can get? Dingo.

How do you raise a baby? Kick the dingo in the stomach.

Why is it so difficult to breed dingo? It takes 9 months to grow food.

What baby in a baby carriage near Ayres Rock? Food on Wheels.

What is the definition of revenge? A baby with a dingo in his mouth.

Mummy! Mummy! I kept running around in circles. Shut up or I’ll nail the others
feet to the floor!

Mummy! Mummy! I hate my father. Well push them to the side of the plate dear
and eat vegetables.

Mummy! Mummy! Hot here. Shut up or I’ll close the oven door too.

Mummy! Mummy! Father will come out. Shut up and give him more gasoline.

Mummy! Mummy! I don’t want to go to America. Be quiet and keep swimming.

Mummy! Mummy! Can I lick the bowl? Not! Flush like everyone else!

Mummy! Mummy! It’s hot here – can I come out? Not! Do you want fire
spread throughout the house too?