The Most Ironic Facts

 

  • Despite ZZ Top members being smokers, they never smoked in convertible cars due to the fact, that if they did, their beards would catch in the wind and the cigarette would catch it on fire.
  • A man from Texas was warned to not swim in an area rumoured to harbour Alligators. His response? “Fuck those alligators” before he jumped in and was promptly eaten
  • The lawyers Donald Trump hired to defend him from lawsuits by unpaid workers are suing him for unpaid bills.
  • The makers of the “Piracy, it’s a crime” advertisement did not have permission to use their chosen background music in the DVDs.
  • Perillos, inventor of the brazen bull execution device, so horrified the leader he presented it to that the device was immediately tested on its own inventor.
  • Mao Zedong ordered the extermination of sparrows across China in order to protect grain seed and fruit for human consumption, but the elimination of sparrows from the food web led to increased insect populations, which ate even more human food and contributed to the Great Chinese Famine.
  • Lawyer Clement Vallandingham died after accidentally shooting himself while attempting to demonstrate that an alleged murder victim could have shot himself. His defense won the case.
  • Motorcyclist Philip A. Contos died after he flipped over his handlebars and hit his head on the pavement. A helmet would have saved his life, but he was riding in a protest against laws that required helmets.
  • No one knows who invented the fire hydrant because the office containing the patent was destroyed by fire in 1836.
  • Mithridates VI, the King of Pontus, was so paranoid of being poisoned that he took small doses of poison all his life to build immunity. When he was defeated by the Romans, he tried to kill himself with poison but couldn’t because he was immune.
  • A tree planted in memory of George Harrison, the lead guitarist of The Beatles, died after being infested by beetles.
  • The night before his execution, a convicted murderer in Georgia escaped from the prison only to be beaten to death in a bar fight later that night.
  • At the prime of his musical career, Beethoven was deaf.
  • Gunpowder, which revolutionized warfare and death, was invented as an ancient Chinese attempt to create an elixir of immortality.
  • A man drowned at a lifeguard pool party that was thrown to celebrate the first year on record with no drownings.
  • James Naismith, who invented the game of basketball, was the first basketball coach of the University of Kansas. With a record of 55-60, he remains the only coach in the university’s history with a losing record.
  • The phobia for palindromes is aibohphobia, which is a palindrome.
  • The fear of long words is hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia.
  • An artist who was expelled and told he would “never amount to much” was later commissioned to paint a portrait of the very headmaster who expelled him.
  • Because polar bears are so efficient at retaining body heat in the coldest climate on Earth, they are more likely to overheat than to get too cold.
  • Alexander Graham Bell, inventor of the telephone, could not use it to communicate with his mother or wife, as both were deaf.
  • Famous British seaman Admiral Horatio Nelson suffered from chronic seasickness.
  • There were over 300 misspelled entries in the 1996 edition of the Webster dictionary.
  • Barry Manilow sang a hit titled “I Write the Songs,” which was not written by himself.
  • J.J. Thomson won the Nobel prize in Physics in 1906 for showing that electrons are particles. His son won the same award in 1937 for showing that electrons are waves.
  • American Civil War General John Sedgwick stood in the open telling his men to stand because the enemy soldiers “couldn’t hit an elephant at this distance.” Moments later, he was struck in the face by a sharpshooter’s bullet, and killed.
  • John Morales, an actor who played McGruff The Crime Dog, was imprisoned for possessing 1,000 pot plants and a grenade launcher.
  • The only member of ZZ Top who did not have a beard was Frank Beard.
  • Charlie Chaplin entered a Charlie Chaplin lookalike contest, and didn’t even make the finals.
  • A Canadian university promoted safe sex by handing out condoms with safety tips stapled to them. The condoms were recalled because the staples had punctured holes in the condoms.
  • Gary Kremen, founder of Match.com, lost his girlfriend to a man she met on his website.
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