The man who stubbed his toe and blamed his chair
Jerry: OW! for fuck sake you stupid chair.
Jerry: If you could feel pain I’d kick you, you stupid piece of shit!
Chair: But I do feel pain Jerry.
Jerry: You can talk?! I’m going crazy!
Chair: You’re not crazy Jerry I’ve always been able to talk.
Jerry: Oh shit I need to get out of here.
He turns to run out the room but in his haste he runs into the desk by the door.
Desk: Sorry that was my fault.