How you can tell when it’s going to be a bad day

A Really Bad Day

A Really Bad Day

You wake up face down on the pavement

You put your bra on backwards and it fits better

You see a TV news team waiting in your office

Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles

You want to put on the clothes you wore home from the party and there aren’t any

You turn on the news and they’re showing emergency routes out of the city

Your twin sister forgot your birthday

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You wake up and discover your waterbed broke and then realize that you don’t have a waterbed

Your car horn goes off accidentally and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hell’s Angels on the freeway

Your boss tells you not to bother to take off your coat

The bird singing outside your window is a vulture

You walk to work and find your dress is stuck in the back of your pantyhose

You call your answering service and they tell you it’s none of your business

Your blind date turns out to be your ex-wife

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Your income tax cheque bounces

You put both contact lenses in the same eye

Your pet rock snaps at you

Your wife says,”Good morning, Bill” and your name is George